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Does it squeak?? Tales of prosthetic balls and mens health

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As I was offered a prosthetic testicle, and knowing I was not going to be starting a new career in nude modelling or porn, the only question I could think to ask the consultant was does it squeak when you squeeze it?

It was 2013 and I was being talked through the surgery options for testicular cancer. After some confusion about the question being asked, the consultant informed me that no the prosthesis would not squeak and so we both decided that since there was no fun element being added by it that I could live without it.

Fast forward to 7 years later and after the surgery and a round of chemo therapy, I’m happy to say I remain cancer free and live with good health. I also realise that I not invincible or not as much as I though it was anyway, and that mens health is a big deal.

Most men are good at putting off illness or pain or other health concerns and dont like to visit the doctor. I’m definitely in that camp myself and because of that attitude I’m lucky to be able to be here to write this.

I think that especially in these times when we are all so focused on the covid pandemic it easy to lose focus on other areas of our health.

My message in these times is that we need to stay focused on our general health and stay alert to changes in our body.

Testicular cancer for example which affects around 1 in 270 men per year has a 95 percent sure rate, but like everything else it needs to be caught early.

Please make sure you are checking yourself daily, any pain, anything different, any lumps or bumps that were not there before, get it checked it out.

I could certainly have saved myself alot of stress and hardship by manning up and going to the doctor when I first noticed something different.

Same goes for all areas of your health. I see so many stories right now about health services being stretched by covid 19 and while that’s true, If you have a health issue whatever it may be you owe it to yourself, your loved ones and your friends to go get it checked it, 99 percent of the time it will be nothing, but the one time it may be something that visit could literally save your life.

Stay safe and health.

Lessons I’d share with my 20yr old self….

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This is really a story of self reflection for me and as such its quite unusual for me. I’m normally focused on moving forward as a person and as they say hindsight is a great thing.

However I’ve been through some big changes in my life the last few years and during a conversation with my partner I was challenged to really think about this question.

Generally I’m someone who doesn’t believe in regrets or the need to dwell on past mistakes so this is not that kind of story, but for me at least it’s interesting to write about for my own self reflection if nothing else.

Now I have to say that so far I’ve had a pretty good life, I’ve been fortunate enough to be able to build a career which pays me well and allows me to travel extensively. Before that I had a great childhood in a middle class family with lots of support to follow my dreams as I saw them.

So based on all of those facts, if I really think about (and right now in lock down in central asia one thing I have is time…) what kind of advice could I give myself?

Lifestyle : Looking back I would’nt change much but to say I liked to party would be a huge understatement, I still do occasionally. I’d give myself the advice to balance out my partying with building a strong financial future. As I said I’ve always had a steady job and good income so this was not a priority for me at all until I got into my 30’s. So while I wouldnt change much, my attitude which was here today, gone tomorrow I would change slightly to focus some more on building a strong financial foundation.

Health: Yep this is an area I would have focused on alot more. My lifestyle definitely gave me a few scares and it was only cancer in my late twenties that made me slow down a little and focus more on my health. In fact only now in my mid thirties am I understanding that I’m not invincible and that I need to take care of myself. I could have taken a much shorter journey to reach this conclusion for sure.

Ego: Yep check I have one of those, and in my younger days it was huge, on display and pretty much uncontrolled alot of the time. Unfortunately that no doubt means alot of people have a dissapointly bad impression of me as a person. Partly due to self improvement and partly just due to growing up and becoming comfortable in my own skin, it’s under control these days, very rarely makes an appearance and when it does its recognized and dealt with promptly. I do wish at times I had that understanding and ability in my 20’s.

Just be yourself: One big life lesson, no one really cares how you look, how you carry yourself, the decisions in life you make to a certain extent as long as you are yourself. There is no need to have different versions of yourself for different occasions, all this does is mask your insecurities and harm peoples perception of you. Although I will say that as you get older peoples perception matters less and less.

Relationships: Don’t rush in, it’s your 20’s go have fun. But most importantly don’t stick with something which doesn’t work, have the courage and self confidence to see the reality of life and make decisions in your own best interest, in the kindest way possible for the other person, I’m a big believer these days in karma…

So after being asked what I thought would be a painfully difficult question to answer, here are my thoughts. It’s actually been a very healthy exercise for me I would say and I recommend it to others, even if it’s just processing those thoughts in your head.

It’s actually reinforced some of the thoughts I have on the direction of my life and I have still have a positive outlook on my past with very little in the way of regrets or negativity clouding my thoughts.

Thanks for reading

Buy, hold, sell — wealth creation and investment in these strange times.

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It’s a big question right now, with some commodities and the majority of share prices at all times low what done do for the best.

Well alot of people are saying keep your power dry and continue to hold cash, I dont think that’s bad advice at all actually and it’s also advice I’m sticking to for the time being.

Obviously any investment decision anyone makes is deeply personal and I’m in no way qualified to help anyone with their investments or finances but I do think there are a number if interesting things going on in the market right now that are worth us knowing about, even if it’s just for fun and to pass the time.

If you want to then explore those further then that’s up to you as an individual.

Energy shares and particularly oil and gas related shares, have as demand for oil and gas has fallen through the floor just crashed. Many of the stocks have lost 70 percent plus of their values since January. Typically these shares come back as the commodity price comes back and the market settles out, which with everyone across the world in some form of lockdown will still take some time.

Now could be a good time to take advantage of the low buy in, invest in these stocks for the upside as the markets rebalance or hold onto them for the dividends they regularly pay. As energy stocks are generally seen as dirty or tainted today by environmentalists these companies will keep paying premium dividends to offset that outlook and keep the big institutional investors interested.

But what about assets, well depending on what those assets are and where they are in the cycle it could be time to buy, continue to hold or to sell.

As an avid watch collector I’ve seen values of some watches hold pretty steady and others soar, big impact brands like rolex, panerai and patek to name just 3 are either not on production or are operating at a limited manufacturing capacity. This could therefore be a good time to sell, certainly some of those watches are going up in value right now so it’s worth keeping an eye on.

Classic and or collectable cars is also a market worth looking at right now I think based on some of what I’ve seen. While the bubble burst sometime ago back in 2019 we still hadn’t really witnessed a huge rebalance of the market although I think we are staring to see that now, which is great of your buying, although obviously terrible if your selling.

What’s interesting about this market is parts and accessories. So many of us are at home right now and those interested in cars and bikes, are digging out old projects, this is starting to take a grip on parts and accessories values and so those are actually going up. A good time to see what you have stuffed in the garage or shed and get it online perhaps.

The point is that in these uncertain times, it pays to look at the various markets and outlets, some of us will continue to hold our cash, some will look at opportunities and see investment potential and yet others will find they have riches long ago buried that are worth alot more than they paid for them…

Even if you just take a passive interest right now like myself, spend a couple of hours digging around, it’s a fun use of your time and I guarantee you will be surprised at what’s going on right now.

Creativity, something for the weekend sir?

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No matter what your hobbies and pursuits are, chances are that right now you can’t indulge in them at the weekend the way you normally would.

To effectively break the weekend out from the rest of the week during these times, we need to break out our creativity and do something different.

Luckily for us all there are literally millions of options here, most of which can be enjoyed from the comfort of our very own lockdown cell, sorry I mean home…

The internet has a big role to play here as we can search for how to guides and video content to help us start well just about anything.

Being creative and using the artistic sides of our brain and personality has huge physical and mental health benefits and also has the handy advantage that it distracts us and takes us a usefully large portion of our time once we are in engaged in a creative activity.

It could be photography, after all your smart phone give you all the options you need and an app such as lightroom or others gives you alot of creative possibilities for those photos for free.

You could take that final step and get writing on medium, on your own blog or even just in a journal.

You could learn to play that instrument that gathering dust in the attic.

You could even indulge in some drawing or painting, got some paper, or wood or plasterboard etc in the garage? Got some household paint and a kitchen knife even? Great you can now have hours of fun creating abstract art.

The list of possibilities is endless, but what they all have in common is that they are all tremendously good fun, great for your mental and physical wellbeing and easier than you think to get started.

This weekend give it a go, I guarantee you wont regret it…

Keep Buggering On and other lessons we can learn from the struggles people endured in WW2 at this difficult time.

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If you have read anything else I have written this week you will know that the current pandemic has been on my mind.

Most of what I’ve written has been about staying positive and while I am in no way comparing this current situation to the hardships, tragedy and atrocities people faced in WW2 . I do think we can relate to some of the restrictions on movement and look to those amazing people to come out of this with some wisdom, some lessons learned and a different perspective on life.

Firstly as my idol Winston Churchill said — KBO or keep Buggering on. No matter what life throws in your way just keep your head down and keep going, keep aiming towards your goals. The direction of life doesn’t need to change, but keeping a positive attitude and recognising that the journey may just take a little bit longer will make a difference in your ability to deal with all this change in our lives right now.

On the issue of positivity, its important to keep everyone around us motivated, if we cant do that then it’s time to take some time out for ourselves and get our thoughts, emotions and attitudes adjusted to the positive, before we interact with our social group.

Especially when your all in the same situation and climbing the walls, negativity is toxic, we can all do our bit to avoid it.

We are stronger together, when was the last time you engaged with the community you live in? For many of us probably not all that often, especially with today’s age of the internet and social media we do spend far longer interacting online with people than face to face in our community.

Today we can change that, even with social distancing we can use whatapp for example to interact with the neighbourhood, support those who need help and interact with each other positively

We are all in this situation together and we are stronger working through the issues of quarantine and lockdown together positively.

The civilian world largely did that 81 years ago, and while we are not facing the same issues right now that the world was back then, we can adopt the same attitude and come out the other end with some positivity and a new found appreciation for each other.

Is lockdown burnout a thing?

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Many of us are in lockdown or some form of quarantine with restricted movement.

At once we have freedom from the commute, more time with family and more free time to ourselves even while working from home.

The flip side is that of course we feel we have less options availible to us for using that free time, we are also missing out on alot of diverse social interaction that being in a physical workplace and going through life, shopping, attending hobbies etc we experiance in every day life and that we are missing out on now.

So with those things taken away from us temporarily is lock down burnout a new phenomenon? Yes I think it absolutely is…

It’s not all bad news though, we can prevent and avoid it with some shifts in our patterns and behaviours.

Socially we can meet friends on skype, whatsapp etc, we can sit with each other, have a beer, catch up, gossip and keep the social interaction going, it’s still face to face which is what as humans we need.

We can do the same thing with our colleagues. Missing office humour and lively debate with colleagues? Simply move it online for the time being.

The free time we have that we cant use outside in the community?

Well there are lots of other ways to use that. What are the things you’ve wanted to do for a long time put have simply been procrastinating on?

Take up a new hobby. Do you have a passion for something but never really picked it up and developed it? Now would be a good time to do that.

Got a musical instrument in house gathering dust? Go online you will find plenty of courses for free and who knows maybe your the next Ray Charles, Miles Davis or Jimi Hendrix??

Still need inspiration- there are plenty of courses, guides and blogs online to help you learn a new skill, you may even be able to pick up a qualification or two while you are at it.

What is equally important is that you dont chain yourself to your laptop, working from home generally means you have a little more freedom. If you need a break take one, need social interaction get online with your colleagues and try to compartmentalise your day.

That family time you suddenly have, why not kill the internet for a certain time each day and get the Lego or cards or board games out and have some good old fashioned fun.

Trust me you will thank yourself later

Change is here, let’s embrace it

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In the last 10 to 15 years the world has been changing at an astonishing fast rate. At the same time Humans, dread, hate and generally do everything we can to avoid change. Some of the change we have seen is for the better and some we could argue is for the worse such is the way of the world.

2020 is definitely causing widespread change across the globe and in all areas of our lives like never before, we just need to get comfortable with it and embrace the changes.

Winston Churchill once said that “to improve is to change and to change often is to be perfect”

We all have the power and ability to change our outlook to suit our circumstances, and likewise we all have the ability to be comfortable with and embrace change.

t’s an opportunity to pursue new hobbies or take up old ones. It may be the opportunity to take a new challenge in a new country or it may be unfortunately also be a forced change in circumstances.

Whatever it is try to embrace it, remember that change itself does not have to be negative, we control what we think and we control how we react. If our thoughts and reactions are positive then change itself is nothing at all to fear.

How and when changes come to us are largely uncontrollable from a personnel perspective and what we cant control should never be a source of worry, apprehension or regret.

How we react to the change, make the most of it and use it to thrive, that we do control.

At the end of the day who doesn’t seek perfection? Even just a little??

Recession beckons — A chance to expand your horizons???

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Yesterday I talked about working at home and the potential advantages of that.

So with recession looming is home where the heart is or is home where the opportunity is?

Well for myself I have to say it’s where the opportunity is.

That opportunity comes in many forms, monetary, travel, culture, adventure and a chance to live outside your comfort zone.

I’m very fortunate to have been able to travel the globe and make a living since my late teens and I’m a big believer in travel expanding the mind.

However living and working in a foreign country has many more advantages to it especially if the world does go into recession.

The chance to go live and work in another culture I regard as a real privilege and a chance to really experiance other parts of the world first hand, meet new people and learn many different perspectives.

In fact I recommend it to as many people as I can. It’s not for everyone but if you can make it work for you then great.

You will come away from your time on assignment with a different and refreshing perspective. Depending on where you choose to travel to you may well build a resilience, can do attitude and flexibility that you would not have had before which will put ahead of your peers.

As most of us will know, in a recession cash is king. If your moving from a country with high tax rates and high costs of living to a country with a more friendly attitude to taxes and lower cost if living then straight away your ahead, your costs are less and you have more cash to hand to weather the storm and make the most of the opportunities that come your way.

Think about it, and if in these uncertain times you are given the opportunity grab it with both hands and make the move.

It might be time to modernise your resume.

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It’s a horrible job but no time like the present.

Resumes and cover letters, two horrible formats to have to use to sell yourself, but they are the formats that most businesses tell us we need to persevere with when applying for jobs.

No matter whether you are applying for a promotion, looking to change career or in the active job hunting market, most of the time we need to use these outdated tools to get to the interview stage.

I hate updating my resume and cover letter, really hate it. As a result I very rarely sell myself well in either document. That’s ok if I’m applying within my network or even in my wider industry to a certain degree as my contact base and experiance might be enough to carry me. But I’m a perfectionist I always want my resume to shine. I just struggle to be anything but self effacing.

However since I’m working from home, and im digging through a list of the other jobs I hate and procrastinate over, I’ve added the resume to the list.

After an initial review while the formatting and grammar were all ok, its 3 years out of date. I have alot of work to do.

It’s also just flat, it reads like a long list of technical jargon that pigeon holes me, not the resume of a person with a broad range of experiences and skills. Looking at it, all I could do was shake my head and despair over what I need to do.

Luckily for me help is at hand

There are a number of free resources out there.

An internet search will provide you with a huge number of free guides and resources to get your resume reading more like the sales document for you that it should be in no time.

Canva a free app which I come back to time and time again for templates for all sorts of different subjects, provides a huge array of impactful visual templates for your resume.

LinkedIn is another great platform for hints and tips, right now you can also find coaches who will give your resume a free health check and some more hints and tips on how to improve the presentation to make you stand out from the crowd and deliver the information you need to convey clearly and effectively.

Hints and tips to keep your resume out of the waste paper bin

Use a head shot : you have a smartphone, something smart to wear and you have a solid coloured wall somewhere in your home, take a presentable professional headshot and include it at the top of your resume. Never ever doubt the power of appearance.

Template: there are thousands out there to choose from, lots of colours and distractions will detract from the power of your message, but at the same time there is nothing worse than a boring white page with a list of accomplishments, trainings and jargon. Choose a smart template that allows you to lay out your information in a clear and tidy way with a small splash of colour and personality.

Formatting: the document should be well formatted with margins, fonts, text sizes, headings, sub headings all presentable and consistent. If your not sure how to accomplish that, search it. There are thousands of guides out there and 20 minutes online will help you out.

Describe yourself: dont just list what your experiance is. List what makes you, you, the skills and experiance you bring. That could be problem solving, analytical skills, people skills whatever those are describe yourself and your attributes. LinkedIn bios are a good example of this, I could be a project manager for company x, but my bio may describe me as a practical problem solver with strong analytical skills in the manufacturing business.

Split up the experiance and the technical stuff: sometimes less is more, your detailed job history yes we need that, the skills and experiance you gained and challenges you faced, yes we need that. Do I need to know each and every piece of equipment, software, hardware, cell phone or app you used in that job? Maybe I do but dont include it all in one long list. Split out the detailed technical parts into a separate appendix. It’s all still there and if its appropriate to the situation the reviewer can read it. It gives them the choice and a resume that’s easier to read and pick out information from is more successful.

Training: dont list every single course you have ever completed, I dont need to know you are certified to use a printer 3000 or that you are certified to use PowerPoint. I get it they may be may be big achievements for you, but are not exceptional to the prospective employer. List the training that gave you skills and experiance or developed your knowledge in an area that’s relevant to their business and discuss what that training did for you, dont just list the course.

Hobbies and interests: yeah I know we have all been there and mine normally reads along the line, reading, music, football and golf. So compelling to the reader.

Instead list the main ones and discuss why they are worth mentioning, maybe they give you a transferable skill, teach you life lessons, de stress you etc. Many of our hobbies and interests are assets to us on a resume if we discuss them in the right way.

A good resume will run to maximum 3 pages, well formatted with spellings and grammar on point with the head shot at the top of page 1 front and centre.

Hopefully you find these tips and tricks helpful and useful.

If your struggling with this right now like I was reach out there is lots of help at hand.

Paying it forward

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Acts of kindness or support your community could maybe use right now

This is a subject that is feels very relevant to me right now. The ongoing lockdowns and quarantines that are affecting myself, my friends and my family in various parts of the world, have changed the world we know in such a profound way in such a short period of time.

I’m in a fortunate position where I have everything that I need, I’m not a frontline worker, so I have the luxury of working from home. At home I have internet to allow me to work and be paid for it, I have clean water and I have food.

I have a colleague who is currently working in the Ivory Coast, who is now working tirelessly to help those affected in her community there and those back in her home country Malaysia. When I saw what was happening there and the impact in both countries which are so far apart from each other in both distance and time zones, it really got me thinking that I could do more also.

Now donations and charity in particular are very individual beliefs and I wouldn’t want to push my own beliefs onto anyone else or tell anyone how to spend there own money.

But maybe there are some things that we can do that cost us only time and if you are in the position to do any of these things I would urge you to consider them, not only may you help someone or help the healthcare system, but by paying it forward and practicing an act of kindness you might just feel better yourself as well, and who wouldn’t want a boost of energy, happiness and confidence right now?

We can do things like use video calls, and video messages to check in with friends and love one. Maybe even make them laugh, it takes 2 minutes to brighten up someone’s day.

Seeing a friendly face on WhatsApp, Zoom, Skype etc. and catching up with them face to face online can make the world of difference in someone’s life.

Our healthcare systems are under pressure with regards to PPE, items like latex gloves, face masks, safety glasses, googles and masks are all in need. Maybe we have some of these items hiding in toolboxes, shelves and cupboards in the house, shed or garage. If we all take 5 minutes out of our day to check what we have, we may find some items we forgot that we have or don’t have a need for anymore. There are Facebook pages, Instagram pages, radio campaigns for this were people can donate these items safely following social distancing guidelines. There is an added element to this in that you never know what pleasant surprises you many find for yourself during this exercise.

Other things we can do is donate stuff we don’t use any more such as, clothes, food items, toys etc.

Its all needed and its sometimes better to donate than trash if its in good condition, both for yourself and your mental wellbeing which gets a boost, and the environment.

Like I said I wouldn’t presume to tell anyone how to live their lives or spend their hard earned cash. These are just some things Ive practiced or been amazed at others practicing during these strange times.

You never know, it may give you the opportunity to connect with old friends, family you don’t always manage to keep in touch with or clear space by donating urgently needed supplies that you never use.